rainbows in the house

haha yea literally there's a rainbow in my house.haha.during my 21 days trip in taiwan, my dad and sister have been embarking on a painting project!haha damn cute!! my dad asked my what i would like and i told him a rainbow and yea it's there now!hee.now my room, my hall and my sisters' rooms have paintings on the wall!hee.in the past every single wall in my house was white and like boring and minimalistic and all cause that's how my mum likes it but now it's so colourful!!!;)hee i don't know why it's actually quite childish but like i like it soooo much!=)haha.here's the pics!!



rainbow in my room



cat at the end of the rainbow



hall



other side of hall



my sisters' room - my fav cause it looks like a safari/nursery.HA

in rainbows:)

it's coming out!!!haha finally:)))))) in rainbows is the title of radiohead's latest album!yay i'm so happy.hee.but like i'm so ashamed of myself cause i didn't even find out myself.sheesh.thank god sandra told me abt it.haha.thanks!;) you know you know it's soooo cool...the album is sold online for digital download on oct 10 for any price you want to pay for it!!!cool ya?? cool ya? i love radiohead's randomness and don't give a shit about anything or anyone attitude.haha.this is their seventh album so far starting from pablo honey in 1993.i love them i love them!:) i have every single song from all their albums thanks to brandon.thanks brandon for introducing me to this great great band!haha.however the physical album itself is only coming out first week of december, in which i'll be in the jungles of brunei testing my mental strength.you know what know what? it'll be a great christmas present for me!:)hee*hint hint*haha.it's a deluxe boxed version that includes a double vinyl disc, a book, eight bonus tracks and two CDs.cool.and costs 40 pounds.eeks.quite costly but worth it i tell you worth it!haha.

this is the track by track preview: http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/16654550/radioheads_in_rainbows_trackbytrack_preview

you know what i can't stand is if the same thing that happened to muse happens to radiohead.when muse released their latest album everyone got so crazy about them..they rose to great superstardom and i'm not saying they dont deserve it but yea the have been around for so much longer than people think..everyone keeps thinking they are some new brit rock band breaking into the market when in fact they've already had three very much nicer albums before that.ha.oh well.if that happens to radiohead, i'll just choke to death.because they have managed to cheapen my most favourite band in the world.ha.

new old discovery

i found this band that i used to like so many million years ago!haha it's called garbage and sounds awfully like metric..oh well it's more like metric sounds like garbage.haha.

sample of some songs!

Garbage - Bleed Like Me


Garbage - Androgyny


Garbage - Push It


Garbage - I Think I'm Paranoid

huh?

courtesy of facebook

happy children's day!

omg it's children's day today! wheeeeee:) haha i'm gonna celebrate it by going for my last ever exercise/mission in singapore as a cadet!haha.oh well i've not been a child for such a long time now but there's an inner child within all of us yea? they say old people get a second childhood when they become real old..like olderly old.hahaha.

i was looking back and thinking of those times in bmt when i didnt have a com..and i was reading my journal entries in my little black notebook..i remember i used to write in them all the time cause i was so bored..i bitched about people in there..i recorded all my weird thought and ideas and complains and irritations and happiness and sadness and blah blah blah in that small little book that i still have now. there was this weird entry where i wrote:

" would the whole world be shifted out of it's rotational axis if everyone in the world, all six billion of us stood on one side of the world and jumped and landed at the same time..exactly the same time.would there be an earthquake powerful enough to tear the world apart? a resultant tsunami wave massive enough to drown the whole world? would earth fly out of this solar system and get sucked straight into the sun?"

haha.omg i remember writing that in a training shed in the sun waiting for night life firing to commence.it seemed like only yesterday that i enlisted in the army..we gave a photo frame with this picture of us in it that was taken just shortly after i enlisted into bmt..my hair was still shaved and all..it was that night van decided we should try this steamboat thingy place at potong pasir and then we went to TCC at PS to sit down and chat..yea so last sat gane was saying how he rememebers how it seemed such a short while ago that he sent us off to bmt..and now i'm gonna commision as an officer.wow.okay i'm rambling on and on cause i'm in one of those moods where i just feel like talking and talking alot of nonsense and rubbish but there's noone really online now to talk to me and all.well van's online but she doesnt have time cause she has stupid mid terms in smu and all.

i wanna get a tattoo and ink myself. i wanna listen to my radiohead songs. i wanna go out with all my friends, one at a time for lunch to spend quality time with them. i wanna not go for tonight's mission even though it's kinda one of the last we'll do already and i'm not even doing much. i wanna meet more people. i wanna fly overseas. i wanna send faye off this thur and hug her for the last time and see her cry cause she's so cute when she does. i wanna play squash. i wanna run for my school again. i wanna do something constructive. i wanna compose a song. i wanna sleep without caring about the time. i wanna make so much money i can give so much to charity i wont even feel the pinch. i wanna tell my instructors that they are screwed up and good for nothings who only know how to pretend they know their stuff when they don't. i wanna know what my future would be like.

okay i have to stop now or i'll just go on forever.tata!:)

goodbye my friend

i hate goodbyes. yes i do. but i've done it so many times already..sometimes it's when they leave physically(overseas studies), and sometimes it's when they leave...like leave for good. faye's leaving on thur and i cant even send her off.sheesh.sorry man duty calls.haha.i'm gonna miss you loads and loads and loads.who am i going to go out with when i book out on weekends now that you're gone huh?ha.oh well hun hope you do take care of yourself there and try to have some fun while you are at it too.ha.

have some pride boy

i'm sitting here at my com in my bunk and outside my window i see the basketball court where my whole wing is assembled and getting ready to move off for our third consecutive mission/exercise which has been spread across the last three days. sleep has decreased substantially and workload has increased exponentially.

i could be sleeping now, but somehow it just doesn't feel right resting and relaxing when my friends and fellow cadets are out there; not resting and not relaxing.somehow i just feel this sense of guilt..a guilt that i'm not sure i should be having or not.

on wed i booked out to go to cmpb to get an x-ray of my chest because of this nagging weezing cough and tightness in my chest over the last one and a half months. i could carry on with training properly but i thought that maybe i should get it fixed before going for any of my overseas trips with ocs. so i came back on wed and moved out immediately for the first exercise.came back late that night..thur morning to afternoon was spent on the second exercise. i gave my x-ray thingy to the medical centre on thur afternoon and they asked me to come back on fri for the review and that's why i'm down here and they are out there.

somehow deep down at the back of my head the words "chao keng!" are ringing. and i'm sure some or possibly many other people are thinking the same thing about me. and i don't really know if it's actually true.. i believe that the mind is really powerful and it's able to force the body into certain conditions such that it would be favourable to the person in question..in this case, maybe i have such a great desire to escape from training my body is intentionally not getting well so that all this can happen..so that i can have just that little more rest. the ailment is a fact and i guess all these are speculations but somehow it just nags at me, because why should i require more rest when 76 other people do not? i think that maybe i should, maybe i should..i don't knowww...

this morning amanda was awake when i woke up at 445am. i was complaining (as usual) about how tired i was..i meant that i was physically and mentally tired and also tired of this ultra long officership course..but what she said to me kinda woke me up and made me realize what i was doing here in ocs..i quote her "and you know you're doing all this because you're part of the elite okay? you're an officer." and "just remember, i know you feel like giving up. but you were put into this because you were meant to be different, stronger from the start. so persevere okay."

thanks amanda:) i so needed someone to tell me that and remind me that i always wanted to be where i am now. perhaps over the last six months of rigorous training i seem to have lost my direction and forgotten what i'm like. what i am now is not me. i have lost that motivating touch; that special spark i use to have to help others..now others help me.

i think i'm feeling like this only because the last few days have been really taxing. i should be fine on normal occasions. i guess it's only a matter of perspective but yea i do feel drained.anyway if you're wondering i'm not skipping the whole of today's exercise..i'll be down at 10am after my review and i wouldn't have missed out on much of the training yet. this training stretches till 11pm tonight so i'll be involved in the main bulk of it still.

bookout is on sat.i can't wait.

a clockwork orange

try reading this book.i tried and failed.i shall try again next weekend.ha.

P.S. i bet you have read this rachel! right?ha.

threadless!

yay i got a new threadless shirt from ethel.hee.

i went online to find some designs of threadless tees and i thought these were catchy.ha.

drain you

i couldn't think of a title for this post so yea this is the title of the song i'm listening to right now by nirvana.haha.

anyway it's been pretty long since i last wrote here..well it's cause i'm bored of writing in here..oh well.i'm in camp now waiting to go for lunch and i dont have anything to do so yea i guess this is a good way to pass the time..NOT.but i'm still doing it anyway.sheesh.

let's start with last last sun! it was AHM..finally! after so many months of training with the team it was finally time to do it.woke up at 2.45am the night before..or well that morning to get ready for the race cos it started at 5.30am.sheesh.talk about long days ahead..and it was really a long day ahead..well i didnt do too well for the race..i'm supposed to be 6th fastest in the team..but yea after everything was over andi checked the results..i was only 17th in the team..sheesh..oh well..people who have never been infront of me and have only seen my backs while running were overtaking me..but nothing was cooler than miss elain lim!! my ex teacher from cj track and current friend.haha.she overtook me at the 3km mark!!haha.and it was a 21km race.she's good man...goooooood.she completed in 1hour29min..roughly about the same time as the fastest runner in ocs team.HAHA.i did about 1hour37min.sucky..was supposed to run with nabil and jj and dex but yea fell behind..jj and dex did alright with about 1hour30min and nabil about 1hour34min.quite disappointing la but then again it was quite respectable already.haha.



and why i said it would have been a long day was because my PC and AHM teammate..cpt ho..collapsed at the end line and passed away.i don't wanna talk about it anymore but he sure deserves to be rememebered for life..and emulated as well.he was the nicest person i knew in army already.seriously..only the good die young.

the next few days was mainly for his wake..for grieving..and for his funeral..

there was one day that we were allowed to book out but we had to book in the next day..so me and nabil and dev decided to just go town and hang around and play and all..it was a damn fun experience..cos like nabil and I went out all the way to the late night to like eat supper with van and faye and eventually end up sleeping over at eddies's house.haha.we almost didnt have a place to sleep for the night.haha.

went back to cj with faye and angie to collect my A level cert which has been 6months overdue.haha.then went with faye to her sec sch to see her teachers.haha.then watched ratatouille with faye!niceee..our first movie together.haha.it's one of those heart warming snuggle up shows.haha.but yea..then went home and forgot to take my cert back from her back.haha.

went for a long run on sat morning..those like hour plus runs..i miss running on sat mornings..i used to do it with the team every single sat without fail..even when we had a navigation exercise immediately after that..ran for 1hour20min like that but i walked whenever i reached a traffic light.hee.tired laa..ran around ele's house there and she says next time i run pass her house i can ask for a glass of ice cold water!yay!=))

oh yea then last sat i went for sandra's birthday party! i burned her a cd and brought marshmellows and kicakapoo to her house..which i almost couldnt find.haha.it was a very nice and warm party..like she only invited a small group of 6 or 7 friends..and i was one of these special friends.yay! i feel so honoured.haha.and did i mention?the stingray was freaking good.haha.


here's a random pic sandra's sis took at sandra's birthday party - i look like a dork.haha

last sun night we booked in and then booked out on mon afternoon.how cool was that.haha.met up with faye and bren and van and mr wong on mon for lunch and catch up..went to bren's house the whole of yesterday to play xbox360.haha.ok thats about it.

i've been working out i think i'm bigger now.i hope i am bigger now.HAHA.

okay nichola this post is like almost 3 weeks worth but it's still definitely too short for the competion we have.haha.

Nirvana - Drain You

gone going gone

couldn't sleep last night!! arghhh..saw some stuffs than kept me awake longer than i should.and i'm sure those stuffs were not meant for me to see either.but yea anyways..

i have a competition with nichola to see who can write a longer post!haha..i'm sure i could win but..but i feel so tired today.and today..today i dont feel like telling the whole world what's happening in my life..tell the world how i'm feeling..and tell the world everything and anything about me.

i feel so exposed and vulnerable all of a sudden.

so here's for some music..and yay! i've upgraded to ~videos~! hahaha.

Gone - Video

Just - Video

Uno - Video

Creep(acoustic) - Video

how i made my millions

this song..this song just thugs at my heartstrings..

Radiohead - How I Made My Millions


i booked out yesterday afternoon and havent been doing anything productive so far..i started on harry potter last night and read till page 90..i shall continue on later after this.haha.

so anyways i was clearing up some stuff on my table in my room and i found a whole stack of about a hundred piano scores that i so passionately collected in my JC days to play..i've never learnt to play the piano but i had about 14 years of electone(keyboard) background so well it wasn't too hard to pick it up. you might be thinking that the piano and keyboard's kinda similar and that the only difference was that one had two levels and one had one..well i thought so too but until i started on playing classical and contempo piano songs on the keyboard did i realize how different they were..different styles..different scales..different emphasis.

so yes it took me quite a while to pick it up but i did so eventually in a couple of weeks and soon i was off to printing and photocopying my favourite coldplay, radiohead, etc piano pieces to play at home..i tried one classical piece..moonlight sonata first movement and it was quite a joy to hear yourself playing such a sweet piece.

so yes! back to what i was saying..i found a stack of these almost-forgotten pieces and played them for a while just now;)feels really nice to know i haven't really lost my touch after so long in the army..and yea i played "how i made my millions" and "fog" and a couple more before i stopped.

sometimes i feel that people(including myself) read too much between the lines..they imagine up stuff..imagine that there's some meaning to this all when there isnt actually..because well we all want to have that sense of security yes? we all want to feel that we are worth more than we really are..we want to feel important..useful and appreciated. i found a perfect example to illustrate this point..there's this song called "karma police" by radiohead and it seems to be so deep..so full of meanings and thoughts and what..people were interpreting it like mad coming up with all the different theories as to why thom yorke wrote this song and what message he was trying to put across.finally when they did ask him personally what the song meant..his reply was - "nothing..it was just putting together a bunch of words that sounded nice together" it's hilarious.i can imagine the looks on those people's faces.

likewise for this song i went online to search out the "meaning" of this song and there were a million versions as to what the song truly meant.

i usually listen to the songs i like not so much for the meaning of it..but for the ~music~ if you know what i mean.and i'm gonna continue doing so.ha.

okay i just saw this pic on the net and i thought it was cute.HA.talk about multi-tasking huh.haha.



well life for me in the next few weeks is gonna be quite easy and realxed..i'm starting to enjoy the life maaaan.haha.i've got the army half marathon race next sun and boy am i scared..freaking scared..i have race day nerves if you know what i mean..it's like 21km! you screw up the first 5km and it's gonna be pure torture the whole way.argghhhhh! okay shan't think about it anymore..plus plus we have to wake up at 3am to get ready cause the race starts at 5.30am.talk about early man.it's mother-early.ha.okok don;t think about it anymore!

tomorrow i'm gonna send my foxtrot friends off for their very exciting trip to brunei.and bloody hell they had to make it 2330hours.how to go home huh?huh?huh? so inconsiderate never think of the people sending them off..i can see my money flying awayyy.haha.prolly share with DJ and nichola if they're there..unless they've got other plans..bbut knowing me i would rather just sleep.haha.well before that i would be going to my first ever party in a long long long time.it's not one of those parties at the clubs or what..it's a real party..like in a function room thingy..okay i'm not very sure what's it gonna be also but it's at the legend along bukit timah there..yaa..it's for ness's farewell party..she's organising and i'm invited=)))haha i should be man i mean i've know her since we were pri 4..that makes it 9 years boy.wow.ha.

okay i just remembered i wanted to put this pic up a long time ago too..pic of my good old sierra friends.ha.



dai jing, peck lim, me, nichola


tralala okay i think this post is long enough..i have been ranting on and typying for quite some time now..i'm off to immerse myself in the magical world of harry potter!...not.haha.

this is the song i was telling you about just now..i wanna play and sing like thom yorke!!!haha.hail to radiohead;)

Radiohead - Fog

baby did you take your meds? / my mojito

as you can tell i can't decide what the title of my post should be..so yea..haha.




ok a mojito is a drink..i know it sounds vulgar but yea it's this new drink i discovered in timbre on wed night.haha.check it out if you don't believe me.haha - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mojito

so yea! i went to timbre for the first time (i know i'm lagging stop laughing!) on wed night and it was quite fun! pity i don't have any photos to put up. i really like the atmosphere and the music..so much better than the usual stuff like zouk, mos, double o..blah blah blah..my army friends have been bugging me to go along with them for the longest time to club or pub every weekend, inclusive of this particular wed too.but yea i didnt want to.you know why? i don't really want to be associated with a bunch of testosterone-filled army boys.HAHA.sorry yea but thats the truth.haha.anyway i had this feeling that i would meet someone i knew over there(besides my friends, of course) and i did!!haha.so weird.plus they were on the table next to mine!haha.i looked around and there they were..esther and anthea's usual bunch of cj friends.well they're all one year younger than me but i recognized them and i think they recognized me too.well i know anthea and esther from track so yea..but esther wasn't there, though she messaged me a short while later to say she WAS supposed to be there.haha.pity huh..talked to anthea later outside timbre for a while after all her friends left.and i just realized..that was the longest conversation i ever had with her so far.ha.well i wouldn't mind talking to her more though.haha.

Placebo - Meds

floating on clouds

many people would sooner die than think; in fact they do so.

i admit i'm like that most of the time too. my buddy here..he's such an intellect and academic.plus he's an all-rounder who can do everything and anything.i feel so small and insignificant next to him but i also thank god he's my buddy cause he comes in real handy.HA.

well he has made me face the stark reality that i do not think as much as i should..or at least not as much as he does. i've such a simple way of thinking it makes me wonder how i got through life so far.ha.seriously!

i have decided that from now on i shall be more intellectual..wondering why and how things work and if they don't, how i can make them work.ha.i shall..i will.i hope.HAHA.

today was the closest so far that i've managed to try to get a ride up to the moon.sat on a chopper and floated on the clouds!haha.feels real gooooood=)

believe it or not

i'll never die for my beliefs; because i might be wrong.

how would you know if what you believe in is really truly essentially what you may be trying to believe in?

i read this quote and thought to myself that yea although some things may seem worth dying for..we may die in vain for it.

ever wondered how our thinking is so manipulated and affected by societal norms restrictions and whatnot. what ever happened to our freedom to believe in whatever we want? i guess that freedom's been void the day we sold our souls away.

besides that..have a great day ahead!haha.enjoy this song=)

Radiohead - Fake Plastic Trees

the war won't stop for the love of god

i thought this was funny.ha.

Metric - Monster Hospital

time of your life

i believe if you stare long and hard enough into someone's eyes..you stare straight into their souls.

amidst all that talking yesterday..i almost forgot something..

i hope you had the time of your life=)

Green Day - Time Of Your Life

i'm not here..this isn't happening

haha okay i found this on the net and found it pretty appropriate..

i feel so spread thin..like a ghost stretched too far for his own good. it's time for change..and time for me to find myself once again..find the daryl chew that's really daryl chew.

i think..i think it's not so bad, now that there's some closure.at least i know what happened, and what's going to happen. my life isnt standing still anymore.

i think..i think some good can come out of it afterall. it's like a balance..or something like that..

i just want to wish you all the best..i'm sure you'll do great!..and yes i mean it=)

i'll do great soon enough don't worry so much, or feel bad or what ok?;)

i think..i think..

i think i need to disappear

Radiohead - How To Disappear Completely

thin necked wine bottles and wide cognac glasses

okay this is so weird cause i'm writing my posts in like reverse manner..or something like that.ha.

last sat was one of those outings with ~Da GaNG~..haha..one of those times when most of us managed to make it and have fun and laugh about stuff and plan about our future and ya..stuffs.mostly was just catching up with each other after so long..talking about our experiences and gossiping and bitching about others!haha.

well it was overall great cause i didnt have anything else to do anyway also.haha.

these are just some of the pics we took.memories encapsulated in pixels=)






and now for a song! - ideas and thoughts immortalised in matrix codings.haha.

Coldplay - In My Place

paranoid android

speaking of paranoid android..here's the song by radiohead.haha.

i guess sometimes we just have to take things as they come.don't you think? if they'll come they'll come..if they don't then don't cry cause there's nothing you can do about it.or can you?

Radiohead - Paranoid Android

can you blame me?

i awoke this morning with an extreme sense of emptiness..one i've not felt for quite a while now. i just feel so alone even though i have so many friends around..so many people i can talk to and so many people who will listen..but i just feel so cold right now.

i don't know what's going on anymore..i feel so locked out and so separated..detached from the exact same thing that once made me feel so warm..so welcomed.

am i paranoid? you can't blame me for being so..paranoid android daryl chew who doesn't know what's going on anymore..

do you remember?

The Postal Service - Against All Odds


how can I just let you walk away
just let you leave without a trace?
when I stand here taking every breath
with you, oooou
you're the only one
who really knew me at all

how can you just walk away from me
when all I can do is watch you leave?
cause we shared the laughter and the pain
and even shared the tears
you're the only one
who really knew me at all

so take a look at me now
there's just an empty space
there's nothing left here to remind me
just the memory of your face
take a look at me now
there's just an empty space
you comming back to me is against the odds
and thats what I've got to face

I wish I could just make you turn around
turn around and see me cry
there's so much I need to say to you
so many reasons why
you're the only one
who really knew me at all

so take a look at me now
there's just an empty space
there's nothing left here to remind me
just the memory of your face
take a look at me now
there's just an empty space
but to wait for you is all I can do
and that's what I've got to face
take a look at me now
I'll just be standing here
you coming back to me is against the odds
and thats a chance I've got to face

take a look at me now

and once again..

ok i know this is brutally stupid of me to do it but i just feel like saying - i miss you quite badly.

take what you need and be on your way

sometimes i just wished i had a bigger and more important part to play in making the world a better place..it's like my hobby.haha.its like..as though it's my personal crusade to fix things..to help people..to fix people actually.

i don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing! but yea recently i've been losing confidence with myself..i don't really believe in myself anymore cause i've been feeling so useless.is it even worth it to try sometimes? i just hope it turns out for the better.

please just give me something to fix...

or fix me.

Death Cab For Cutie - Crooked Teeth



It was one hundred degrees,
As we sat beneath a willow tree,
Whose tears didn't care, they just hung in the air,
And refused to fall, to fall.

And I knew I'd made a horrible call,
And now the state line felt like the Berlin wall,
And there was no doubt about which side I was on,
mmhmm

Cause I built you a home in my heart,
With rotten wood, and it decayed from the start.

Cause you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.
No you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.

I braved treacherous streets,
And kids strung out on homemade speed.
And we shared a bed in which I could not sleep,
At all, woo, hoo, woo, hooOoOo.

Cause at night the sun in retreat
Made the skyline look like crooked teeth,
In the mouth of a man who was devouring, us both.

You're so cute when you're slurring your speech,
But they're closing the bar and they want us to leave.

And you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.
No you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.

I'm a war, of head versus heart,
And it's always this way.
My head is weak, my heart always speaks,
Before I know what it will say.

And you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.
No, you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.
(No you can't find) And you can't find nothing at all,
If there was nothing there all along.
There were churches, theme parks and malls,
But there was nothing there all along.


and this is to you who's feeling sad or emo or whatever.i hope you feel better.really:)

Oasis - Stop Crying Your Heart Out



Hold up... hold on... don't be scared
You'll never change what's been and gone
May your smile... Shine on... Don't be scared
Your destiny may keep you warm.

Cos all of the stars are fading away
Just try not to worry you'll see them some day
Take what you need and be on your way
And stop crying your heart out

Get up... Come on... why you scared
You'll never change what been and gone

i've got a plan..a plan to lose it all

Only the losers win
they've got nothing to prove
They'll leave the world with nothing to lose
You can laugh at the weirdos now
Wait till wrongs are right
They'll be the ones with nothing to hide

'Cause I've been thinking, thinking
I've got a plan to lose it all
I've got a contract pending on eternity
If I haven't already given it away
I've got a plan to lose it all

I've been the burnout kid
I've been the idiot
I'll turn the other cheek to be hit
You can take what you want from me
Empty me till I'm depleted
I'll be around if I'm ever needed

I wrote this song for you
To show how I'm selling out
I'll take the benefit of a doubt

i've never thought about it this way before..that only the losers win cause they've got nothing to lose..nothing to prove..

it's quite a unique song you have to admit.ha.

i just want you to know who i am

Goo Goo Dolls - Iris


And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

me and my time machine

hello there oh man this last few days have been rather tiring and tough maaan.haha.slept like 3 hours plus last night only and the days just goes on and never waits for you.nothing waits for you here...just like how time never waits for you.haha.

i wish i had a time machine..make time wait for me..control fate and destiny.haha.

yesterday, one year ago, i was running the track nationals finals..1500m and 4x400m with my greatest and closest friends supporting me and cheering me on.haha.that was exactly one year ago and i was still a civilian with a proper civilian life and yea..just not in army.haha.

today..i just wish that i could go back exactly one month back in time..to that special day..that day which will stay in my mind for quite a while.hee=)

Oasis - Don't Go Away

for your ears only=)

been really busy this weekend! no time to write! have to book in damn early!haha.

this is for your ears only=)haha.

The Beatles - I Want To Hold Your Hand

bookout bookout bookout

wow it's wed already!haha i thought it was tue only till i saw the date.haha.yaay bookout on fri night again.ha.so happy man.this two weeks have been so easy it's quite hard to believe.i think its cos the next two weeks are gonna be damn tough.haha.oh well might as well enjoy today ya.ha.

oh man i was looking at the track national's results just now and i cant help feeling it's sooooo unfair! if i had participated in this year's 800m race, i would have been guranteed a medal. seriousssllyy. sheesh.my timing i did last year would have got me a second place in the heats.sheesh..with this kinda motivation..i'm sure i would be able to go that 0.1 sec faster to get that gold medal.i mean jj would have no prob getting first...and heck bren could get third and cj would have a straight 1-2-3 finish.whyyyyyy?haha.i know it's all about pride but yea..dang the dragon year..so bloody competitive for what.haha.

Incubus - Drive

run again?

had IPPT today..it's like NAPFA without sit and reach so yea it's quite alright..got gold..of course.hee hee. then after that had army half marathon training!..and that was the killer maaaann..2x5km.sheesh.i wanted to fall out so many times.but yea i didnt..so proud of myself=)

there's this song that keeps playing in my head...hey esther you havent heard it ya so this's for you to sample..hope you like it!=)

Plain White T's - Hey There Delilah

so freeeee!=)

oh man today's such a free day again..it's like the deep calmness before a storm..before i get killed outfield next week and the week after and so on till the end.haha.i have to treasure these times now of relatively free freedom man.

i cant think of any nice song to put up now cause i dont have my ipod with me..but yea these songs are on the radio now and they're quite nice.

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Face Down


The Bravery - An Honest Mistake

where's that rainbow again?

hello there! i'm trying to remember when was the last time i saw a rainbow and i cant recall when it is. i hope i find my rainbow soon and when i do,remind me to look for what's at the end of that rainbow.hee.i think you think i'm taking drugs and typing this..i think i am too..but yea.haha.

Isreal Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over The Rainbow/What A Wonderful World


yesterday i had this mega japanese buffet at some hotel in havelock road..it was awesome man..the salmon sashimi just order like nobody's business one man.ha.i had 26 slices altogether!=)))haha. only problem was that i had a very bad cold..and yea i couldnt even taste anything..i thought i could until i put a slab of wasabi on my tongue and couldnt feel anything!haha.man can you imagine how tasteless my tongue was that night.

immediately after that buffet i rushed down to chomp chomp to meet tim gan, jessica and dai jing for jessica's birthday.as usual..i was the first even though i came from somewhere other than home.haha.the irony of it all huh.oh well came home and slept after that.

today i was supposed to meet esther but alas..that poor girl fell sick!take care ya!=) well now i'm just at home doing nothing and trying to kill time..i just woke up from a nice two hour plus nap after lunch and now i'm just here doing this and that on the com..i would like to go for a run..another looonong run but looking at the sky i'm quite certain i should not step out of the house.haha.

omg i sill havent watched transformers! please dont laugh.i'll watch it soon..next week or what..yes next week i swear.haha.better not close maaaann.haha.

i think..i think i have this skill.to laugh even though i'm not happy..to smile even if i'm sad..and to joke even if i'm angry..its a very good skill to have i tell you ..should learn some day.haha.although if you get very proficient at doing it(like i think i do) you tend to forget what you really feel.you forget or become not sure what exactly it is you are feeling..are you happy just because you want people to think you are happy or are you really really happy.you tend to get confused most of the time..i dont know if you will..but i sure do all the time.

i should stop thinking so much.don't panic.just live.life will catch up with you no matter how fast and far you run.i have to stop running and start living.

Garden State/Coldplay - Don't Panic


hey so now's the part where i play DJ and give you a whole list of noce songs to listen to!haha.if you have anything to say about the music please leave me a comment so that i can make improvements ya?=)haha.enjoy!!!

Radiohead - I Might Be Wrong


Muse - Escape


Dishwalla - Angels Or Devils


Stars - Your Ex-Lover Is Dead


Oasis - Wonderwall


Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now

Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day?
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after an
You're my wonderwall

Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me


Lifehouse - You And Me


what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up
and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

all of the things that I want to say
just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping inwards
you got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

there's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
everything she does is beautiful
everything she does is right

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive

Bright Eyes - First Day Of My Life


This is the first day of my life
Swear I was born right in the doorway
I went out in the rain
Suddenly everything changed
They're spreadin' blankets on the beach

Yours is the first face that I saw
Think I was blind before I met you
I don't know where I am
I don't know where I've been
But I know where I want to go
So I thought I'd let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realized that I need you
And I wondered if I could come home

I remember the time you drove all night
Just to meet me in the morning
And I thought it was strange
You said everything changed
You felt as if you'd just woke up
And you said,
This is the first day of my life,
Glad I didn't die before I met you
But now I don't care I could go anywhere with you
And I'd probably be happy.

So if you wanna be with me
With these things there's no telling
We'll just have to wait and see
But I'd rather be working for a paycheck
Than waiting to win the lottery

Besides maybe this time it's different
I mean I really think you'll like me...

i hope this song will guide you home

The Postal Service - Such Great Heights


I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay
True, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great
Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
'come down now,' but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave this all on your
Machine but the persistent beat it sounded
Thin upon listening
That frankly will not fly. you will hear
The shrillest highs and lowest lows with
The windows down when this is guiding you home

lalalalalala=)

since entering dA aRmY..i seem to have forgotten alot of things about myself..i'm so different now! so..armified..soo many things that i used to enjoy..all forgotten..like the songs i listen to.haha..music's really my life man..

thanks esther for reminding me how much i love this song!=)

Death Cab for Cutie - I'll Follow You Into The Dark


i was listening to this song too this morn..oh man..i was gonna sing it for social night in sierra if if IF i had got into the finals.haha.but yea i didnt..not that i was particularly keen on singing on stage anyway..haha but yea..here it is!

Train - Drops of Jupiter


Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of jupiter in her hair, hey hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's time to change, hey hey
Since the return of her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and talks like June, hey hey

But tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is over rated
Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And then you miss me while you were lookin' for yourself out there

Now that she's back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation, hey hey
She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo
Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey hey

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane
Told a story 'bout a man who was too afraid to fly so he never did land

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back to the Milky Way
And tell me, did Venus blow your mind
Was it everything you wanted to find
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you
even when i know your wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance, five-hour phone conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had... and me

But tell me did
you sail accross the sun
Did you make it to the Milky way
to see the lights all faded
and that heaven is over rated
Tell me did you fall for a shooting star
one without a permanent scar
and did you miss me while you were
looking for yourself
na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,
na,na
And did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,
na,na
And did you fall for a shooting star
Fall for a shooting star
na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na,na
And are you lonely while looking for yourself out there

i wanna go home

its one of those days..i feel like flying to the moon..in a capsule where time does not move...where time freezes at the right time and the right place to capture the right moment..

a pity time waits for no man..rachel told me once that many ppl overlook the factor of time..it's very true i guess..though i dont really know what it means.haha.i get it..but dont really get it..aiyah..listen music can already dont need to think.haha.

i prefer this version of this song..more..soothing..haha.

Evangelion - Fly Me To The Moon


Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars
In other words hold my hand
In other words darling kiss me

Fill my life with song
And let me sing forevermore
You are all I hope for
All I worship and adore
In other words please be true
In other words I love you

oh yea here are a few more songs that i was listening to that day and yea i'll like to share them with you! pls enjoy!=)


The Postal Service - Nothing Better



The Killers - Change Your Mind

i want a cardigan

they played this song on the PA this morning..it has so much meaning to me..it says all the stuffs that i wanna say for me.

music always has this weird effect on me.i dont know why..but yea i like it.ha.

The Cardigans - Lovefool


Dear, I fear we're facing a problem
you love me no longer, I know
and maybe there is nothing
that I can do to make you do
Mama tells me I shouldn't bother
that I ought just stick to another man
a man that surely deserves me
but I think you do!

So I cry, and I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Lately I have desperately pondered,
spent my nights awake and I wonder
what I could have done in another way
to make you stay
Reason will not pledge a solution
I will end up lost in confusion
I don't care if you really care
as long as you don't go

So I cry, I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

(anything but you)

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
Love me love me
I know that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

why didn't it work this time?

had AHM training today..16km..one of those nice long runs..long runs to clear your mind of whatever troubles you have and whatnot.but it didnt work this time.not this time man.sheesh.

i was running on just pure emotions.run run runnning away trying to escape from reality..i didnt even feel tired cause of all that emotions welled up in me. i tried to make myself so tired i would stop thinking..have no more energy to think..maybe i'll feel better.but nope..couldnt..no matter how hard i ran i wasnt tired..the emotions were just so great it was overwhelming.it's amazing actually how powerful welled up emotions can be..it never goes away.i wish things didnt have to end up like this.i can only hope..and pray.

oh yea i came in first today for the first time as a result.haha.

never fear for daryl's here

The Fray - Look After You


If I don't say this now I will surely break
As I'm leaving the one I want to take
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait
My heart has started to separate

Oh, oh,
Be my baby
Ohhhhh
Oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you

There now, steady love, so few come and don't go
Will you won't you, be the one I'll always know
When I'm losing my control, the city spins around
You're the only one who knows, you slow it down

Oh, oh
Be my baby
Ohhhhhh
Oh, oh
Be my Baby
I'll look after you
And I'll look after you

If ever there was a doubt
My love she leans into me
This most assuredly counts
She says most assuredly

Oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you
After You
Oh, oh
Be my baby
Ohhhhh

It's always have and never hold
You've begun to feel like home
What's mine is yours to leave or take
What's mine is yours to make your own

Oh, oh
Be my baby
Ohhhhh
Oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you

You are so beautiful to me (repeat)

i've decided..and i shall stick by it

wow this four days off from ocs almost made me forget that i had to book in today.sheesh.i feel like post A levels days all over again man.haha.

well i've been thinking alot lately..for i dont know what reason..and lately i've been feeling kinda confused and lost..i dont know what to think anymore..yea i woke up damn early this morning and couldnt sleep cause my thoughts was just swirling round and round in my head.its getting on my nerves..so i took my ipod..wore some singlet and went for a run..one of those long runs..those therapeutic runs that just helps you get over what it is you are trying to get over..and it worked!haha.i feel so much better now..though still a little shaky..but yea..my mind is clear..i've sort through my thoughts and there's no turning back anymore..smile!=)

this is for you reading this.

Goo Goo Dolls - Let Love In


You wait, wanting this world
To let you in
And you stand there
A frozen light
In dark and empty streets
You smile hiding behind
A God-given face
But I know you're so much more
Everything they ignore
Is all that I need to see

You're the only one I ever believed in
The answer that could never be found
The moment you decided to let love in
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel
The end of fear is where we begin
The moment we decided to let love in

I wish
Wishing for you to find your way
And I'll hold on for all you need
That's all we need to say
I'll take my chances while
You take your time with
This game you play
But I can't control your soul
You need to let me know
You leaving or you gonna stay

You're the only one I ever believed in
The answer that could never be found
The moment you decided to let love in
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel
The end of fear is where we begin
The moment we decided to let love in

There's nothing we can do about
The things we have to do without
The only way to feel again
Is let love in

There's nothing we can do about
The things we have to live without
The only way to see again
Is let love in

You're the only one I ever believed in
The answer that could never be found
The moment you decided to let love in
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel
The end of fear is where we begin
The moment we decided to let love in

not another one?

haha hey man i just feel like putting up so much music today.it may be good or bad..but they're just the songs i feel like listening to right now.haha

Oasis - Stand By Me


Coldplay - The Scientist


Muse - Unintended


Metric - Poster Of A Girl